The Two Empty Chairs........

I went up Wenatchee this past weekend with my husband and my kiddos, it was the first time being up there since my grandpa's funeral. The thing that was the hardest for me was seeing Gramp's favorite chairs empty. When I walk in the door to their home Grams and Gramps are usually standing up waiting for hugs and kisses. Grandpa would get a hold of me and say hello dear and give me a kiss on my cheek. This time the chair was empty. Though I embraced my grandma, it felt like something was missing......

My grandpa was such a wonderful person to me. He was one of my favorite people. To sound really silly but honest he was my hero, a source of courage to draw from. My grandpa had a lot of health problems that kept him in constant pain. Some have described him as grump, tough, scary. To me he was and will always be just grandpa. He never was too busy for me.

I have so many many memories with him. I remember one time I was spending the night at their home when I was younger, we ended up in Freddies buying gramps new underwear. I remember them buying my sister Jenny and I our Easter dresses. I remember sitting next to gramps at the thanksgiving table, he would tell his other grandchildren that the seat next to him was reserved for me. I remember that I let gramps meet the boy I was dating in High School, needless to say he wasn't the "one". Gramps let me know, but not in words. In 2004 that same "boy" died in Iraq when a car bomb hit his vehicle.

I remember sitting in his home office with him as he shared many stories and photos of years past. I remember his pig collection. I remember he set up his trains and farm equipment in his office. He had a special place in his heart for me. Now his computer chair is empty......the memories will never be empty, my heart will always be full.

I think the important thing or things to me is what he thought of me and how my life turned out. I was a rebellious one and so desperately wanted a place to fit in and feel loved. No matter what I did Gramps loved me through it all. He told almost every time I saw him how proud he was of me. When Joe became a part of my life my grandpa couldn't have been more proud. He loved my husband like he was his own grandson. He would tell people about his service and how he proudly served in Iraq. I remember meeting quite a few of their friends. They would introduce me, and then when they got to Joe they would remind them that this was the one who served in the Army. My kiddos have very fond memories of him. I am thankful my children had such a wonderful great grandpa. Our daughter Shayla was known for climbing up on grandpa's lap during our visits to Wenatchee. In May he was in too much pain and couldn't hold her. She was looking forward to this October so she could sit on his lap again. When he passed away in June the first thing she said amongst all the tears was, I didn't get to sit on his lap again. This October visit came, and Shayla immediately went to the empty chair and sat. Most of the weekend she was just in the chair...........to some it may be a chair but to my 6 year old little girl it will always be more then that.

In May, when I found out how sick I was, my grandpa called me and left a message telling me how much he loved me. I had this strong urge to save the message, which I did. I told friends and family that I couldn't loose gramps during this time of my life. I needed him and for him to know I was ok. I never got to tell him that. I am sure he knows. I remember calling him a week before he passed to get his advice on the drug Prednisone. He told me many a stories of his dealing with the drug. The last things my grandpa ever said to me speaks volumes to me because of humor and the depth in which he cared for me. He said that prednisone will make me fat but to not to worry cause he will love me anyway. What a wonderful man.....I miss you so much!